Halting Subs, But Going On (and On)

Thu 21 Dec 2023 - Filed under: Not a Journal., , | Posted by: Gavin

Thank you, Vanessa Armstrong, for this news story about Small Beer on Tor.com.

The article led to a small flood of men emailing manuscript submissions and queries, showing that no matter how clear a headline is (“Small Beer Press Is Halting New Publications” is very clear), some people don’t think it applies to them.

I’m 2 years into long Covid. I’ve written updates since March 2022. I never tested positive for Covid. I’ve since had another 3 or 4 vaccines/boosters. I only see people unmasked once they’ve done a Covid test.

From my two years on this couch, I beg you to wear a mask in public/when traveling, etc. Insist on better filters at work or school. Build Corsi-Rosenthal boxes for meet-ups or home.

The Covid virus can attack many different parts of the body. This is a mass disabling event I do not want you to be part of.

I’ve added to the statement below. I realize I go on so please skip to here and pick up some books for yourself/someone you know.

We closed Small Beer to submissions in March 2023 and only published four books this year: two novels and two collections of stories. After 20+ years of reading submissions it’s been very strange to know there are good books I am missing but c’est la vie.

In December 2021 I came down with something unknown. I never tested positive for Covid but in 2022 I was diagnosed with Long Covid. I am a very different person now: I can’t carry boxes of books around, I don’t drive, I can’t read as much as I used to, I lie on the couch most of the day because walking or even sitting up for too long wipes me out. I have tried many anecdotally successful supplements and medicines — none of which have done any good. In the last two years I only see people who have are masked or have tested negative. Kelly drives me into our bookshop, Book Moon, once a week or so where people are unmasked but we run 2 Corsi-Rosenthal boxes and I am always masked. I literally would not wish this on my worst enemy — although I don’t really have one except maybe the soul crushing companies that would like to run all the small presses and indie businesses out of town.

We’d contracted our 2023 titles over the past few years. We have one more title under contract but I’m not sure if we can publish it as I think it’s too much work for me. I emailed with our authors about my limitations and occasionally talked on the phone but phone calls or zooms wipe me out and then I can’t do anything else.

In 2022 we only managed to publish two books. This year we published four and here at the end of the year I see how much these books missed the old me. Sarah Pinsker’s second collection Lost Places was selected for Slate’s Best Books of the Year which is something to celebrate. It’s always hard for small or indie presses to get coverage and no one expects to be on Best of the Year lists but I always hope our books will at least be considered for lists and awards. This year that was more difficult as I wasn’t able to send books out as widely or follow up. Publicity is part of my job and following up takes a fair amount of energy which I don’t have. So unless we want to change our habits and start being unfair to authors, we have to stop.

I haven’t even mentioned our September title, Anya Johanna DeNiro’s short, amazing, difficult, transcendent science fiction novel OKPsyche — the review I enjoyed most was Jake Casella Brookins in Locus which started off, “I was completely unprepared for how powerful Anya Johanna DeNiro’s OKPsyche is” — or our final book, Kij Johnson’s long awaited, decade in the making second collection, The Privilege of the Happy Ending. 

Kelly recently took a two-year position at Smith College so now we will get health insurance there — then we’ll have to work out what to do after that. Kelly’s novel, The Book of Love, comes out in February, and at some point next year we’ll publish a limited edition. That’s been fun to work on and if it goes ok maybe we will do more. Or maybe we will just keep our zine, LCRW, going — although even there we only managed one issue this year. I can’t mail it out anymore so it’s harder to do. I love paper zines, so the intention is there. I’ve been very lucky to have support in the past two years. It is pretty crappy to see the ground cut away from under my feet but I know it could be worse.

In 2010 a friend, Michael J. DeLuca, and I started a DRM-free ebook website, WeightlessBooks.com, and my disability meant I had to step away from that last year.

I’d thought that with cutting down on other things (we don’t travel anymore: no more book fairs and conferences; no more Weightless; a lot less Book Moon; fiction is now quite hard to write) there was a chance I could keep Small Beer going but it is too much. As long as the authors are happy, we’ll keep the books in print — or sell them on where possible: Random House just released the cover for their new 2024 edition of Karen Lord’s debut novel Redemption in Indigo. 

My expectations for Small Beer was that Kelly and I would keep publishing books we enjoyed basically until we dropped dead, preferably a long time from now. So now I have the whole anger and grief that besides not being able to go sledding (if it snows, thanks Shell/Exxon/climate change), or walk the dog more than 1.5 blocks out and back, there’s also no more dancing — I miss dancing. My inner self often has music of my own or others playing and I am often dancing. I am so slow now.

Mine is not a long Covid story where I was once a marathon runner and now I lie on the couch. I liked lying on the couch preferably with comics, champagne, and bonbons. Ok, so that didn’t happen very often, but still.

Anyway. Everyone who is wearing a mask is helping everyone else. You are the helpers and I thank you. I appreciate all the notes from friends and strangers and am replying slowly. It is much easier to be flippant on Bluesky. I keep up with long Covid news.

We have pushed some great and weird books out into the world in the last 20 years, some further than others, but never a book we thought wasn’t odd and great and worth being a physical object in the world. No one knows the impact of a book that has sold 300 or 30,000 copies — it may change the world for one reader. It happened to us time and time again. I look forward to reading more good, odd books from other publishers in the future.